Author: Pastor Chris

Posted on

Am I old enough to make my own decisions?

Question

Pastor Chris, 

Hello I have a question you see I’m 18 and I have an issue and I need help and advice I don’t know what to do you see I’m 18 and I still live with my parents and well my issue is I want to make my own decisions I don’t want to ask my parents for permission I feel I’m old enough to make my own decisions.

~ Briggit

 

Answer

Briggitt,

As long as you live under your parents roof you are to live under their direction. This is difficult for them as well as difficult for you. They have to learn to balance your maturity with their responsibility to care for you and protect you.

Parents have to learn to let go. I am a parent myself and it is not easy, not because you want to control your children but because you love them and desire to protect them. A parent has life experience that can save a young adult son or daughter a lot of problems if he or she will listen and learn from that parent. A parent has to pave the way for a son or a daughter to walk toward adulthood. Part of that task is to allow them to gradually make more and more consequential choices. The Bible says, “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it” (Proverbs 22:6, NIV).

I exhort you to be patient with your parents, listen to them, learn from them, and then get ready move out and provide for yourself. This is the natural way of life. Until then you are to be subject to them. Even Jesus subjected Himself to His earthly parents and He was the Son of God (Luke 2:51-52).

~ Pastor Chris

Posted on

Am I unwanted because I grew up without friends?

Pastor Chris,

Am i mistake or unwanted because i grew up without friends and my life is always complicated that everywhere i go people don’t like me even at work my bosses don’t like me . What should i do? Am i cursed?

~ Andiswa

 

ANSWER

 

Andiswa,

 

It is a wonderful thing to have a friend. The best friend anyone could ever have is Jesus. He is the one who “sticks closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24). The Bible also says that Jesus is a friend to sinners (Matthew 11:19). Jesus will never let you down.

 

I do not think you are cursed. A far as human friendship is concerned we will often be let down and hurt. Everyone I know has been disappointed by others. People can be self-centered and fickle. Sometimes they intentionally hurt us. Other times they are so wrapped up in themselves that they do not realize the hurt they cause others. But it still hurts anyway, whatever the reason.

 

That being said, there are reliable people you can trust to be your true and genuine friend. You just have to find them. Remember, Jesus went out and searched for His disciples. Sometimes we have to go out and search for our friends.

 

How do you find a friend? Here are some ideas:

Be a friend to someone else. Treat someone the way you want to be treated (Matthew 7:12).

Learn to listen to others. Listen more than you talk.

Attend a Bible study group.

Find a lonely person and look for a way to serve him.

Call people by their name when you see them.

Put a smile on your face. Think positive, lovely thoughts (Philippians 4:8).

Go to a retirement center and visit the shut-ins.

Ask your pastor to give you the name of someone who needs a friend.

Write encouragement cards to others who are hurting.

Look around. Others are lonely, too.

A good book on the subject is The Friendship Factor: How to Get Closer to the People You Care for.

 

~ Pastor Chris

Posted on

How did Jesus become God if he was born from mankind?

Pastor Chris, 

Shollom alaikum, my name is Sadam and I am Muslim. I am asking you about Jesus. My question is, I read a bible and I found ,”God is not man and isn’t the son of man”. Then how to Jesus become God because he was born from mankind and is man? Thanks!

~ Sadam

 

ANSWER

 

Sadam,

 

Excellent question! Thank you.

 

The Bible verse you refer to is Numbers 23:19 which reads, “God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind.” This verse uses a metaphor. The online dictionary (dictionary.com) defines a metaphor this way: “a figure of speech in which a term or phrase is applied to something to which it is not literally applicable in order to suggest a resemblance, as in ‘A Mighty fortress is our God.'” We would say that God is strong like a fortress; however, He is not a literal fortress in the sense that He is not a building.

 

Numbers 23:19 uses the negative sense of a metaphor. The verse means that God does not do things like men do things. God does not lie. Men often tell lies. God does not change His mind. Men regularly change their opinions. God is not like a man.

 

Numbers 23:19 is not a statement about the deity of Jesus. Jesus claimed to be God and others said the same thing about Him. For instance, Jesus referred to Himself with the same words God used to declare His name (“I am”) when He spoke with Moses at the burning bush (see John 8:58 and Exodus 3:14). Jesus also declared, “I and the Father are one” (John 10:30).

 

Thomas said he would not believe that Jesus rose from the dead unless he saw the nail marks in Jesus’ hands and put his finger in them. After Jesus died on the cross He came and stood among the disciples several days later. Thomas was there and cried out, “My Lord and my God!” (John 20:28) Paul wrote about the deity of Jesus in Philippians 2:5-11 and Colossians 2:9. Even Jesus’ enemies said that He claimed to be God (John 10:33).

 

Consider John 1:1-2, “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning.” Bible scholar Herschel Hobbs says that these verses tell us that Christ is “coeternal, coequal, and coexistent with God.” He goes on to explain that the expression “the Word was with God” means “face-to-face with, equal to.” Hobbs also helps us to understand that the form of the verb “was” carries the meaning “always was.” He then concludes his analysis of the deity of Jesus contained in these two verses by writing, “There never was a time when this was not true.” (see Herschel Hobbs, The Baptist Faith and Message, Nashville: Convention Press, 1971; p.40)

 

After reading John 1:1-2 be sure to look at John 1:14, 18 which tells us that the eternal Word became flesh at a point in time. That is what happened when the virgin Mary gave birth to Jesus. This is referred to as the incarnation. The angel Gabriel told Mary what was going to happen, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God” (Luke 1:35). It is fascinating to realize that the virgin birth of Christ was prophesied centuries earlier. Isaiah 7:14, “Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel.” The name Immanuel means “God with us” (Matthew 1:23). This virgin born child was called “Mighty God” in Isaiah 9:6.

 

Jesus is fully God and fully man. There is no one else like Him! “He is the image of the invisible God” (Colossians 1:15).

 

The Bible tells us about God’s love for everyone (John 3:16). It also tells us how God expresses His love to sinful people. “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him! For if, when we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!” (Romans 5:8-10)

 

~ Pastor Chris

 

NOTE: All Bible references in this article are from the New International Version (NIV).

Posted on

Who are the people that dwelt in the land of nod?

Pastor Chris,

Who are the people that dwelt in the land of nod,on the east of Eden who Cain went to live amongst after he slew Abel.

Because the bible indicates that Cain Knew his wife,where was the wife from because God only created Adam and gave him a helper Eve, so where did Cain’s wife come from? It is not indicated anywhere that there were other humans that.

~ Rodah

 

ANSWER

 

Rodah,  

The Bible does not list all of Adam and Eve’s children by name. It says in Genesis 5:4 that “After Seth was born, Adam lived 800 years and had other sons and daughters” (NIV). Therefore brothers and sisters married. It was not until many years later during the time of Moses that prohibitions against marrying close relatives were given (Leviticus 20:17).

 

~ Pastor Chris

Posted on

Can you get married without a marriage license?

Pastor Chris,

 

Can a man and a women be married in the eyes of god without a marriage license?

 

~ Tracy

 

ANSWER

 

Tracy,

 

Yes, if you live on a deserted island!

 

The Bible exhorts Christians to be subject to the governing authorities (Romans 13:1-7). Jesus said, “give to Caesar what is Caesar’s” (Luke 20:25). The government requires a marriage license for a man and a woman to be wed. If a man and a woman choose to live together the government still gets involved by declaring that they are married by common law even though they did not have a ceremony or a certificate. You cannot escape the government or God on this issue. “Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God” (Romans 13:1, NIV).

 

I believe that a marriage ceremony and a license are good things. They are public matters. Jesus Himself attended a wedding, thus endorsing the marriage ceremony. A marriage ceremony complete with a license shows respect for God, for government, and for society. Christian marriage seeks the blessing of all three on their union. Why would a couple not desire this?

 

Frankly, a license for marriage helps to maintain an orderly society. When people do whatever they think is right in their own eyes bad things happen (Judges 17:6; Isaiah 5:21). Our culture has a hard time with commitment. A marriage ceremony and a marriage license elevate the importance of commitment to the family. Without stable families led by a man and wife that are committed to each other, society crumbles.

 

For a more detailed examination of your question see Seven Reasons Why God Created Marriage by James Ford, Jr. and Why Marriage Matters: Reasons to Believe in Marriage in a Postmodern Society by Glenn T. Stanton.

 

~ Pastor Chris

Posted on

Am I lost?

Pastor Chris, 

i was saved years ago i had thoughts in my head one day i said out loud the holy ghost was of satan after that i think i said not cause i don’t believe that but i went into all kinds of sin went away from god years i came back to god i wanted to go to church i wanted to so bad i gave up all sin in my life even my job at a bar i gave up all tv that was bad i cry all the time i want to have god in my life so bad i prayed for forgiveness over and over i want to know i believe Jesus is god in the flesh and the holy ghost is gods spirit Jesus cast out satan by the power of god , i am so worried that the holy ghost is no longer with me that i am lost because of what i said i want so much to go to heaven and to do right in gods eyes i pray all the time what is wrong with me is the holy ghost gone away am i lost?

~ Rebecca

 

ANSWER

 

Rebecca,

 

The enemy (the devil) is the accuser of God’s children (Revelation 12:10). He is the one that is tormenting you.

 

A person is born again when she comes to Christ and places her faith in Jesus alone for salvation (John 3:7, 16-18; Ephesians 2:8-9). When a person is born of the Spirit (John 3:8) she remains in that state. She cannot become unborn spiritually anymore than she can become unborn physically. It is forever (John 5:24; 10:27-30).

 

If a pig gets cleaned up it will go right back to its mud hole. It will do this because it is a pig’s nature. That is what pigs do. If a sheep happens to fall into a mud hole it will get out. That is because it is not in the nature of a sheep to stay in the mud.

 

The Bible says the children of God are like sheep (John 10:1-30). Our true nature is to follow the Good Shepherd (Jesus). The fact that you are following Christ is proof that you belong to Him.

 

You fell into a mud hole for awhile. However, you climbed out of that dirty place because you are a child of the King. Now, set your mind on God’s truth and His kingdom. Refuse to listen to the enemy or even your own memories of past failures. When Jesus died on the cross He paid for those failures, so follow Him with your whole heart. It is an incredible thing to be loved so much and forgiven so completely. Memorize 1 John 1:9 and Philippians 4:8. These verses will bless you and strengthen you.

 

For further guidance in these matters I recommend Counter Attack: Taking Back Ground Lost to Sin and Lifetime Guarantee.

 

God bless you! Keep following Jesus. His Spirit has not left you.

~ Pastor Chris

Posted on

Will I go to hell if I kill myself?

Pastor Chris,

Will I go to hell if I kill myself?

~ Mike

 

ANSWER

 

Mike,

 

Let me remind you that all sin leads to hell. We are sinners (Romans 3:23) and therefore headed for hell unless someone saves us. We cannot save ourselves. The Good News is that we have a Savior and Jesus is His name. The Bible says that “there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1, NIV).

 

There are two sides to the problem of suicide that must be considered. One is from the perspective of someone who is contemplating suicide. The other is from the point of view of a loved one who has had a friend or a relative commit suicide.

 

1. For the person who is contemplating committing suicide. Please remember that suicide is not God’s will or plan for our lives. It devastates those who are left behind. A person close to me who has experienced the suicide of a loved one says it is the most selfish thing a person can do. Such a one fails to consider the impact suicide has on others.

 

Also, consider the fact that not all suicides are successful. Sometimes they leave a person in a crippled state or a vegetative state thus becoming an ongoing burden to loved ones.

 

I would ask someone considering suicide if he or she wants to stand before Jesus with murder on their hands. Suicide is murder. Jesus is heartbroken when we sin.

 

When a believer in Christ terminates his or her own life that action profoundly hurts the testimony of the church, which is the body of Christ. Non-believers observing this action can easily conclude that Christianity doesn’t work.

 

2. For the person who has had a loved one commit suicide. Suicide is not the unpardonable sin. Blasphemy against the Holy Spirit is the unpardonable sin (Mark 3:28-29). A person ends up in hell because they refuse to receive Christ, not because they have sinned. Sins can be forgiven. Jesus died on the cross to pay for our sin. When we receive Christ as our Savior we are born again and all our sins are forgiven, past, present, and future.

 

Someone contemplating suicide is in a dark place, consumed with pain. When that happens a believer in Christ may lose perspective. He can forget that he is a child of God, dearly loved by Jesus and others. In a state of depression he hears the voice of the enemy and fails to distinguish it from the voice of God. He listens to the lies whispered to him and falls deeper down that black hole. He feels worthless to the point of despair and makes an attempt on his or her life.

 

It is Satan who wants someone to murder himself, not God. Satan is a liar and the author of death (John 8:44). God is the author of life. If Satan can discourage someone enough to cause them to give up on life then he has done his worst. Nevertheless, you will see your loved one in heaven because Christ said that He holds on to His children forever (John 10:27-30).

 

~ Pastor Chris

Posted on

Do unbaptized babies who die go to heaven?

Hi Pastor Chris,

I have a question regarding unbaptized babies who die, for example a few hours after birth. Do these babies go to heaven? In the new testament going to heaven requires “believing” and “baptizing” or just minimum “believing.” There is no age of accountability in the new testament and a baby is born in original sin, so they are not born “believing” Since they are not born believing and if they are not baptized and die a few hours after birth does this mean they go to hell? Many people try to use the old testament, but weren’t the conditions for belief in god different in the old testament and if you use the old testament shouldn’t christians be applying the old testament rulings for not eating pork and women wearing a viel??

~ Aneel

 

ANSWER

 

Aneel,

 

Thank you for your thoughtful question. I am encouraged to see that you are reading your Bible carefully and often. As you continue to dig into the Bible God will bless you with insight and wisdom for life’s challenging circumstances.

 

Baptism does not save a person. Baptism is an illustration of the life, death, burial, and resurrection of Christ. It is also a testimony of our faith in Him and illustrates the death of our old life and our new life in Christ (Romans 6:3-5). The New Testament pattern is believer’s baptism. A person believes in Christ and then is baptized as a testimony to that fact (Acts 8:26-40). I do not find a Bible passage that teaches infants are to be baptized.

 

The question has to do with the character of our God and His grace. Is God unfair, harsh, unfeeling, uncaring? No. I am comforted in the story of Jesus and the children where He rebukes the disciples for preventing the children from coming to Him. Look at Matthew 19:13-14, “Then little children were brought to Jesus for him to place his hands on them and pray for them. But the disciples rebuked those who brought them. Jesus said, ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.'”

 

Isn’t it wonderful that Jesus said that the kingdom of heaven belongs to children? Be comforted, Jesus loves children and receives them.

 

~ Pastor Chris

Posted on

If I masturbate without watching Porn is that still a Sin?

Pastor Chris, 

If I masturbate without watching Porn is that still a Sin?

~ Alexander

 

ANSWER

Alexander,

 

Do you fantasize when you stimulate yourself? I have never heard of a man masturbating without fantasy going on in his mind. Mind fantasy is lust and Jesus tells us not to involve ourselves with lust (Matthew 5:28). A man can lust in his thought life without actually looking at images. This is sin.

 

Steve Arterburn has written an excellent book on the subject of sexual temptation titled Every Young Man’s Battle: Strategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation (The Every Man Series). I highly recommend this book for a more in-depth discussion of this issue.

 

Scripture tells us to flee from sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 6:18). We are not wise when we dabble around the edges of sin. Play with a snake and you will get bit.

 

~ Pastor Chris

 

Posted on

How can I feel good enough as a Christian?

Pastor Chris,

 

Hello, I know I am a christian, but I still struggle with not feeling good enough. How can I get past this? Also, I sruggle with changing. I know the things I need to do (read my bible daily, pray daily, even normal life things to better myself), but I just can’t seem to to it. Any advice? Thank you.

~ Ashley

 

ANSWER

 

 

Ashley,

 

The enemy of our souls wants you to continue to struggle with feelings of inferiority. Do not give him any ground. Psalm 8 is a real help with this problem. Remember, Jesus thought you were valuable enough to leave heaven and die on a cross so that He could be with you forever in a perfect place. Emotions can lie. Choose to believe what God says. When you set your mind on God’s truth your emotions will be positively affected. Check out Philippians 4:8.

 

By-the-way, no one is good enough. All fall short (Romans 3:10, 23). Only Christ is good enough. He is the only one who never sinned. Part of the marvelous wonder of Christianity is that the righteousness of Jesus is credited to those who believe in Him (Philippians 3:9). As a a child of God you stand before Him forgiven, clean, and free. We are accepted in the Beloved (Ephesians 1:6, KJV).

 

As far as personal change is concerned, the Christian life is a marathon not a sprint. We want things instantly. Some things take time. You can grow a squash in a few months but it takes years to grow an oak tree. A baby takes years to develop into an adult. Be patient with God. He cares deeply about transforming you into the image of His Son and He will work in your life to bring you to maturity (Romans 12:1-2; Philippians 1:6). You may also want to find a friend or two who desire to grow in Christ. Set a time and get together every week. Within your small group of growing Christians you can encourage and motivate each other to pursue Christ with your whole heart. Real change is usually accomplished with one or two accountability partners who are on the same journey.

 

The Navigators have terrific discipleship materials. For instance they have Growing In Christ: A Thirteen-Week Follow-Up Course for New and Growing Christians. They also have The Complete Book of Discipleship: On Being and Making Followers of Christ (The Navigators Reference Library). Why not start these studies with your friends? Be consistent. It will make a difference.

 

~ Pastor Chris