Category: sin

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Release from Guilt

Pastor Chris,

I got born again some months back. Since then I’ve been so much into Christ. I study and I pray. How do I get back up after I made a mistake by making love? How do I release myself of the guilt? I need your advice please.

Stephanie

ANSWER

Dear Stephanie,

The fact that you are feeling guilt is a good thing. This is the conviction that comes from God’s Holy Spirit. God’s conviction is designed to draw us back to Him. We hurt ourselves and others when we fall. We also hurt God.

The Bible says in 1 John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” To confess is to agree with God that what you did was wrong and violated His best for you. When you sincerely confess your sin to God, His promise is that He will forgive that sin. When God forgives, He purifies us and the stain of our sin is washed away.

Once you have confessed your sin it is also important to forgive yourself. This is not to simply excuse yourself as if the sin doesn’t matter. Sin always matters. However, forgiving yourself means that you accept the fact that God has forgiven you and removed your sin from you as far as the “east is from the west” (Psalm 103:12). What a joy-filled thought!

Forgiving yourself is also important because the enemy of your soul, the devil, wants to keep you in bondage to your failure. If you are consumed by your failure you will be of no use to God in service to Him. How much more wonderful it is to accept God’s forgiveness and move forward by living for His glory.

Remember what Jesus said to a woman who had been caught in the act of adultery, “Has no one condemned you?” “No one, sir,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin” (John 8:10-11).

Let me recommend a book to you by Jay Carty. It is titled Counter Attack: Taking Back Ground Lost to Sin. You will find additional insights on practical Christian living in this book.

Sincerely,

Pastor Chris

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Is Sin a Person?

Pastor, just like the HolySpirit is a person, is sin also a person? Thank you for the word of God you have impacted on me, am grateful sir
~ Segun

Answer

Dear Segun,

Thank you for your encouraging words.

Sin is not a person. Sin is the result of going our own way, thus disobeying God. Sin is the English translation of the Greek word hamartia, which means “a falling away from or missing the right path” (from The New Unger’s Bible Dictionary (c) 1988).

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I am an Awful Person

QUESTION

Hello Pastor Chris,

I am from Ethiopia. I am practically a loner. I have a non-Christian girlfriend and I have been totally awful to her. I have been lying to my girlfriend and also have cheated on her. We are still together and I have lied to my friends and family. I am a notorious liar. My mind has evil in it. I am kind of addicted to pornography and everything that is related to it. I do not respect my parents. I think about revenge on people. I manipulate people. I only pray to God when I am in serious trouble. Even now I am in trouble and I am considering church solely because I need relief from my troubles. I have an anxiety problem and many more mental illnesses I notice on myself. My sister once gave me 300 (Ethiopian $) to give to church and I took it for myself. I stole money from my parents. I’m stubborn and just an awful person. I have been thinking about going to church but I am scared the pastor there will speak of my wrong doings to the congregation because they record it live on a Christian channel. I know that should not stop me and I do not know what to do next about my relationship and friends. Please pastor I am an awful person and I absolutely have no one to talk to. I need your advice and prayer. Thank you pastor and pray for me. I am a wreck.

Bereket

ANSWER

Dear Bereket,

There is hope for you! You need to completely turn your life over to Jesus Christ. Give yourself to Jesus without reservation, without hesitation. Jesus is the Savior for the world regardless of what anyone has done, regardless of where they live, and regardless of their ethnicity. Jesus welcomes all people. The Bible says, “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever (even you and even me!) believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life” (John 3:16, NAS). Then meet with the pastor of your church so that he can guide you as you grow in Christ. Get a Bible and start reading the Gospel of John. This is your opportunity for a new life!

~ Pastor Chris

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Question About God's Forgiveness

Would God forgive being lost and sinning for more than 10 years particularly sins of pornography, masturbation and homosexual acts? If you ask for forgiveness and a change of heart? I admit being blinded from the truth which is the bible. It hurts deep inside how much I’ve committed abominations to him. I would just to spend the rest of my life fighting temptation, treating brothers and sisters, friends and family with respect and love…and especially come back to GOD and place trust in Jesus everyday and praying always

~ Jericho

Answer

Jericho,

God is not only willing to forgive all sin, He will clean us up too (1 John 1:9). The story Jesus told about the prodigal son is a picture of our Heavenly Father and His willingness to take us back (see Luke 15:11-24).

Do not wait! Hurry home to Jesus!

~ Pastor Chris

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Is it ok for my husband to look at personal ads on craigslist?

Pastor Chris,

I have been married for 25 years my husband has committed adultery we have been able to work through it we do Pastor a church and trust God I recently discovered my husband is going on craigslist and he is in the personal add under women seeking men and casual relationship he seems to think this ok because he is just reading but because of his issue with being involved in several affairs i feel like he is wrong for being on this site to me he is cheating once again. please help is this ok according to the word of god.

Answer

Dear Sister Perkins,

It is NOT alright for your husband to be reading such material. Such activity violates Genesis 2:24 which teaches that a husband and wife have an exclusive relationship. By reading such material he is diverting emotional energy to a fantasy world. He is forsaking his God-given marital responsibility to care for your emotional needs. He is selfish and is playing with fire.

The husband/wife relationship is sacred. It was established by God and is an illustration of Christ’s love for the church (Ephesians 5:25-32). Christ loved the church sacrificially (agape). Husbands are to love their wives sacrificially, too.

Your husband needs an accountability group of men that he reports to every week. He has an addiction. People with addictions usually do not overcome their addictive behaviors alone.

A helpful book for both of you to read is Every Man’s Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time (The Every Man Series)
. I strongly encourage you to get a copy of this excellent book.

Pastor Chris

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WHY does God allow children to get sick/die?

Hi Pastor Chris!!

WHY does God allow children to get sick/die?

Sincerely,

Debbie

 

 

 

ANSWER

Debbie,

There are consequences to sin. When Adam and Eve disobeyed God, He cursed the earth (Genesis 3). We can trace all of our problems to that one act of disobedience.

 

Adam and Eve could have lived forever on this planet. God told Adam that he would “surely die” if he ate from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil (Genesis 2:17). When Adam ate from the forbidden tree sin and death entered this world and was passed down to us.

 

The rest of the story is this: God loves us and will re-create creation (Romans 8:18-21; Revelation 21:1-5). This life is not the entire story.

We also believe that children who die before the age of accountability are taken to heaven to be with the Lord. Case in point: King David is spoken of as “a man after God’s own heart.” He had a child that died. David said, “I will go to him, but he will not return to me” (2 Samuel 12:23). We cannot say exactly when the age of accountability is. It has to do with a child’s understanding of sin and his or her need of forgiveness for that sin. It also has to do with a child realizing that Jesus’ death is the payment for that sin. He or she then receives Christ as Savior. When a child knows these things then he or she is accountable for them. It has been said, “A child who is old enough to sin knowingly is old enough to believe savingly.” Willful sin is the issue.

One other thing, we also know that God will do the right thing whenever a child dies. God can be trusted in these matters. He is sovereign. His thoughts are higher than ours (Isaiah 55:9).

 

Keep digging! I love it when I find someone who is asking questions and searching for the mind of Christ!

 

Sincerely,

 

Pastor Chris

 

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If I masturbate without watching Porn is that still a Sin?

Pastor Chris, 

If I masturbate without watching Porn is that still a Sin?

~ Alexander

 

ANSWER

Alexander,

 

Do you fantasize when you stimulate yourself? I have never heard of a man masturbating without fantasy going on in his mind. Mind fantasy is lust and Jesus tells us not to involve ourselves with lust (Matthew 5:28). A man can lust in his thought life without actually looking at images. This is sin.

 

Steve Arterburn has written an excellent book on the subject of sexual temptation titled Every Young Man’s Battle: Strategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation (The Every Man Series). I highly recommend this book for a more in-depth discussion of this issue.

 

Scripture tells us to flee from sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 6:18). We are not wise when we dabble around the edges of sin. Play with a snake and you will get bit.

 

~ Pastor Chris

 

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Why do I feel a deep connection with someone if homosexuality is unnatural?

Pastor Chris, 

I would like to know if homosexuality is unnatural, why do I feel such a deep connection to someone of the same sex. Recently this guy came up to me and he wanted to get to know me and I said yes. We went out 2 times. It was great. After that I prayed to God to end this relationship because being gay does not fit with the life I have been leading and I don’t want to lose it or the people I’m close to. Miraculously he just stopped communicating with me. Now I feel emptiness, loneliness, and I am emotionally confused. I think about him all the time. I’m crying as I write this. I guess my question is, I just don’t understand how homosexuality is unnatural or a sin when my heart says different. My heart is hurting because I wish I could make a life with this man without being ridiculed and losing everyone I love.

~ Robert

 

ANSWER

 

Robert,

 

Please read this answer all the way through.

 

The Bible is clear about homosexuality. Yes, it is sinful. Romans 1:18-32 leaves no room for doubt. This passage in Romans speaks to the totality of corruption that sin brings as is refers to sins of the heart (v.24-25); sins of the body (v.26-27); and, sins of the mind (v.28-32).

 

Sin is an abomination, an affront to a holy God. There are many forms of it, homosexuality being one of them.

 

Consider what God said to Cain before he went out and murdered his brother Abel, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you but you must master it” (Genesis 4:6-7).

 

Anger can lead us into sin. That is what happened to Cain. He allowed himself to dwell on his anger over the fact that God did not look with favor on his offering. He was also angry because God did look with favor on Abel’s offering.

 

Watch out when you are angry. In your case it will be a temptation to be angry with God because He said that humans are not to involve themselves in homosexuality. If you allow yourself to be consumed with anger you will be easy prey for the devil who will increase the temptation to rebel against God.

 

Disappointment can lead you to anger. When we get disappointed with God we can easily get angry with Him. Our disappointment with God has to do with our misunderstanding of God and His ways. This will in turn lead us to not trust Him. Failing to trust God is a dead end.

 

It is much better to trust God and take His laws to heart. Happiness and joy come from submitting yourself to God’s Son, Jesus. Consider these verses:

 

“There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death” (Proverbs 14:12; 16:25, NIV).

 

“Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs 16:18, NIV).

 

“A wise man fears the LORD and shuns evil, but a fool is hotheaded and reckless” (Proverbs 14:16, NIV).

 

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” (Jeremiah 17:9, KJV)

 

We have choices in life. Sin is a choice.

 

Temptation is not a sin. It is when we give in to temptation that we sin.

 

Your first and primary relationship is with the Lord. “Seek the Lord while he may be found; call on him while he is near. Let the wicked forsake his way and the evil man his thoughts. Let him turn to the Lord, and he will have mercy on him, and to our God, for he will freely pardon. ‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts'” (Isaiah 55:6-9, NIV). Human relationships are important, but not as important as your relationship with your Creator.

 

By-the-way, it is normal to have feelings of grief when a friend leaves. Whether that friend moves away or simply discontinues the friendship, grief is involved. It is a loss. Do not confuse feelings of grief with sexuality. I have male friends that I laugh with and speak deeply with at a heart level. This is normal. It is a good thing to have trusted friends of the same gender. Just remember, friendship – yes. Sexual activity – no. Your heart can lie to you. Sexual activity of any kind outside of marriage is forbidden by God. He wired us up and knows how we function best.

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IS MASTURBATION CONSIDERED A SIN?

Pastor Chris, 

IS MASTURBATION CONSIDERED A SIN?

~ Ryan

 

ANSWER

Ryan,

 

Jesus said, “I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28, NIV). Masturbation involves lust. It is adultery and is therefore sin.

 

For detailed help you might want to get Every Man’s Battle by Stephen Arterburn and Counterattack: Taking Back Ground Lost to Sin by Jay Carty. Both of these books are thorough, practical, and well written.

 

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Is Dancing A Sin?

Dear Pastor,

Hello pastor Chris. How are you doing? My question to you is about dancing. I am 48 years old and a Christian. I like to dance ,no I love to dance! I have been dancing all my life and the problem I’m having is, I love Jesus so much I want to please Him in every way I can. I heard in my bible study today that dancing is not pleasing to him. I go dancing sometimes Fridays and Saturdays in a club but not to drink or pick up men. I go dance because it makes me feel good.  I am really struggling with this because I want only to please Jesus first. Jesus put the love of dance in my heart and I am very good at it. I know it all comes from Jesus. That was one of the many gifts that I was born with. Please help guide me on what I need to do. I feel I know the answer already, but I am so sad that I have to give up something I really enjoy doing. I don’t really have any friends and I like it like that, no drama in my life. I  love to dance and exercise, that is what I spend a lot of my time doing, other than bible study, always first! Thank you so much for listening to my issue. Have a Blessed day :0)

~Tracy

 

 

Dear Tracy,

There is nothing wrong with dancing. The Bible tells us that King David “danced before the Lord” (2 Samuel 6:14). David was rejoicing because the Ark of the Covenant was being brought to the City of David. (Here the City of David means Jerusalem. Sometimes the City of David means Bethlehem, where David was born.)

The issue is not dancing itself. The issue is what kind of dancing is being done, the music being danced to, and where the dance is happening. Is the dance being done to arouse sensual lust? Is the music filled with vulgarities and encouragements to immorality? Is the location where the dancing is held above reproach?

We have a dance class at our church. It is an exercise class that meets in our gym. Men and women participate. Adults, teens, and children can walk through the gym at any time. The music is never vulgar and is a mix of secular and contemporary Christian.

There may be an outlet for your desire to dance through the ministry of a local church in your area. My wife and I dance at weddings, usually a good place to do so. Some churches incorporate dance into their worship services.

Whatever you do, do for the glory of the Lord!

 

~Pastor Chris